The only way I'll ever make the Ryder Cup team is when I become captain; then I can name myself to the team.

I believe nicotine plus caffeine equals protein.

All four days I didn't think. I just hit. Squeaky (Medlen, his caddy) said 'kill' and I killed it.

My slogan is who needs fitness when you've got great equipment.

In some organizations, it is easy to say mistakes are okay when in truth it is a zero-defect organization. You will be remembered more for your mistakes than your successes in those organizations.

Everyone has addictions and my problem is that I have 5,000 of them. If it's not drinking, it's gambling; if it's not gambling, it's eating anything from burgers, doughnuts to M&Ms. The only addiction I don't suffer from is chasing women.

Seems I used to do everything like I was on a mission. If it was alcohol, I wanted to drink till I couldn't see straight. If it was golf, I wanted to beat everybody's brains out. If it was driving, I can get there faster'n you can. It's not anybody's fault, I guess. I was stubborn as hell. I had no direction.