Reality, while generally probable, is not always interesting.

I really wouldn't censor myself. But because it was on such a slower scale, I would throw things out, and I indulged the personal stuff as little flashes of truth. Little in-jokes for anyone who was paying particular attention.

I know electric knives are excellent for carving turkeys that have had their bones removed and been forced into a mold to shape them. Please note that those turkeys are called hams.

You are only pretentious if you are not sincere.

Hosting a TV show is a full-time job in which success is defined by it never ending.

A lot of media that that I want to consume, I don't want to have to own forever and ever. It's not like real estate.

My whole creative career is a product of the Internet. ...I'll take that back. To some degree. My fascination with cultural esoterica and trivia and so on was well-formed long before I got my first AOL account.