Dream golf is simply golf played on another course. We chip from glass tables onto moving stairways; we swing in a straightjacket, through masses of cobweb, and awaken not with any sense of unjust hazard but only with a regret that the round can never be completed, and that one of our phantasmal companions has kept the scorecard.

The difficulty with humorists is that they will mix what they believe with what they don't; whichever seems likelier to win an effect.

What you haven't done by thirty you're not likely to do. What you have done you'll do lots more.

Atrocity is truly emperor; All things that thrive are slaves of cruel Creation.

Basically it's true that my own life has been my chief window for life in America, beginning with my childhood and the conflicts, the struggles, the strains that I felt in my own family.

Everybody who tells you how to act has whiskey on their breath.

I was made to feel I could do things. If you get this feeling early and can hold it until you're 15, you tend to never lose it.