What happened is that in the middle of my life I went away and in my own sense of hubris, pride, cynicism, thought, I am an autonomous being in the world, I can control things, I am God.' But my experiment at being God failed! And they do have a great saying in AA: 'Get down off the cross, we need the wood!' And the important thing is to realise you are not the centre of the universe, you are not God.

When they throw the water on the witch, she says, “Who would have thought a good little girl like you could destroy my beautiful wickedness”. That line inspired my life. I sometimes say it to myself before I go to sleep, like a prayer.

I understand why people want to look up their friends - usually they want to see what people they've wanted to have sex with look like.

Sometimes I wish I was a woman, just so I could have an abortion.

To me, beauty is looks you can never forget. A face should jolt, not soothe.

Stop blaming your parents. If you're really angry at 60 years old, you're an idiot! You've got to work some of it out.

Catholics have more extreme sex lives because they're taught that pleasure is bad for you. Who thinks it's normal to kneel down to a naked man who's nailed to a cross? It's like a bad leather bar.