I mean, what is prison, really, except a good bar without the liquor?

"How could you think of such awful things?" liberal critics always ask. "How else could I possibly amuse myself?" I always wonder.

[My catholic education] sticked with me. It caused the rage I had to make 'Pink Flamingos.'

The only way I've learned to change anyone's mind politically is to make them laugh. My whole career has been about that.

Hairspray is the only movie I made that's subversive, because they're doing it in every high school in America. A man's playing a woman, and two men sing a love song to each other.

I don't think I had a bad influence on anybody. I made people feel better about themselves.

I think it's all independent films. There aren't any! If they were looking for me when I was making Polyester, then it'd be perfect, but they're not. I'm not looking for that. TV is much bigger and better now; far more people see it.