I’m sort of known in the comedy community as “Smooth Sailing,” just ’cause everything always goes great. I’ve always had success at every turn.

I suppose we all have a lil' inner or outer a-hole inside of us, just waiting for the right opportunity to rear their own beautiful buttholes.

If you're doing stand-up, there is no fourth wall; you're engaging an audience.

I always feel like I'm forgetting things.

For the most part, people don't know who I am.

I'm sort of known in the comedy community as "Smooth Sailing," just 'cause everything always goes great. I've always had success at every turn. Everything has gone well for me. I've never had a project fail. Everywhere I go, it's "What's up, Smooth Sailing?! How are the seas today, buddy?" I'm like, "Calm as can be!"

There were plenty of times some writers would make some kind of stupid joke to each other and then it was on TV that night or that week.