Satire is a sort of glass, wherein beholders do generally discover everybody's face but their own.

All panegyrics are mingled with an infusion of poppy.

Words are but wind; and learning is nothing but words; ergo, learning is nothing but wind.

I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing.

Do you think I was born in a wood to be afraid of an owl?

What vexes me most is, that my female friends, who could bear me very well a dozen years ago, have now forsaken me, although I am not so old in proportion to them as I formerly was: which I can prove by arithmetic, for then I was double their age, which now I am not. Letter to Alexander Pope. 7 Feb. 1736.

The best Maxim I know in this life is, to drink your Coffee when you can, and when you cannot, to be easy without it. While you continue to be splenetic, count upon it I will always preach. Thus much I sympathize with you that I am not cheerful enough to write, for I believe Coffee once a week is necessary to that.