Yes, etiquette is hypocritical. Yes, it does inhibit children - if you're lucky. But the idea that it's elitist and irrelevant is like saying language is elitist and irrelevant.

When virtues are pointed out first, flaws seem less insurmountable.

Adorable children are considered to be the general property of the human race. Rude children belong to their mothers.

Smart people duck when they hear the dread announcement 'I'm going to be perfectly honest with you.

We already know that anonymous letters are despicable. In etiquette, as well as in law, hiring a hit man to do the job does not relieve you of responsibility.

If it's against state law, it's generally considered a breach of Etiquette.

A wedding invitation is sent by people who have been saying, "Do we have to ask them?" to people whose first response is, "How much do you think we have to spend on them?