I knew right then and there nothing was ever going to change. It wouldn't matter if I was tall or short or fat or thin or absent every day. I was a loser from birth.

Stop trying to save me. You couldn't then; you can't now.

With determination and purpose, I head into the light.

What's the point of living if you don't belong anywhere?

There's no reason to speak. I have nothing to say.

Take it as a token. Because tomorrow when I go, I want you to believe friends are possible.

What was I afraid of, exactly? What other people would think? I guess, a little. But that wasn't what was stopping me from acting on my feelings. It was the intensity of them. The desire for her. I knew if I gave into it, I'd have to surrender myself completely. I'd lose all control. Everything I knew, everything I was, the walls I'd built up to protect myself all these years would come crashing down. I might get lost in the rubble. Yet, she made me feel alive in a way I'd only ever imagined I could feel. Bells, whistles, music.