She's still doing it, pushing me into situations I can't handle, making me cope. She knows I can't cope.

I don't sleep. All night long I'm wide awake, thinking, Secrets, secrets, secrets. There are secrets in my past no one needs to know. Secrets in my present that might kill Kim and Chip. I don't want to take my secrets with me when I go. When I pass through the light, i want to be free of everything and everyone.

I want to tell them, "Chip, Kim, there is no way to suicide-proof a person.

Cut the ending. Revise the script. The man of her dreams is a girl.

You would never understand, Kim. You think I'm normal; you wish I was.

I'm sorry you don't get it, Mom. Sometimes I don't get why I do the things I do. I just know I wake up every morning and wish I was dead.

Secrets. I can't take then with me. If I do, when I go, when I arrive at my final destination, I'll be . . . impure.