Children are like crazy, drunken small people in your house.

I always come across sounding like I hate my children. I actually love them very much.

I have this fancy Givenchy bag. I don't know what the Kardashians have in their bags - I bet they have really expensive products or six cellphones or something. I have a cellphone and some lipstick for me, and the rest is just filled with stuff for the kids - sunscreen and lip balm and little Ziploc bags of pretzels and cheese sticks.

I read some article where Reese Witherspoon said, "If you're not yelling at your kids, you're not spending enough time with them." It made me feel so much better.

Kids don't seem to recognize when they're hungry until they're starving and in the emergency zone, so I'm like, "Who wants some apple slices and cheese?"

I was class mom at the preschool one year and I was pretty much asked not to do that again!

I consider a day without running a crappy day. When I don't get to run, I am a grump, but some days my schedule just doesn't allow me to.