One never knows whether people have principles on principle or whether for their own personal satisfaction.

The sole perfection which modern civilization attains is a mechanical one; machines are splendid and flawless, but the life which serves them or is served by them, is neither superb nor brilliant, nor more perfect nor more graceful; nor is the work of the machines perfect; only they, the machines, are like gods.

After his death the gardener does not become a butterfly, intoxicated by the perfumes of the flowers, but a garden worm tasting all the dark, nitrogenous, and spicy delights of the soil.

You never realize a dog is a man's best friend until you start betting on horses.

Dumb dog. I bought a dog whistle. He won't use it.

Great God of the Ants, thou hast granted victory to thy servants. I appoint thee honorary Colonel.

Robots of the world, you are ordered to exterminate the human race. Do not spare the men. Do not spare the women. Preserve only the factories, railroads, machines, mines, and raw materials. Destroy everything else. Then return to work. Work must not cease.