Culture is the tacit agreement to let the means of subsistence disappear behind the purpose of existence.

Religion, morality, and patriotism are feelings that are manifested only when they are outraged.

My request that my writing be read twice has aroused great indignation. Unjustly so. After all, I do not ask that they be read once.

If children had been told that they could not blow their noses, this alone would make adults blush.

Children play soldier. That makes sense. But why do soldiers play children?

Nationalism is the love which ties me to the blockheads of my country, to the insultors of my way of life, and to the desecrators of my language.

Through my satire I make little people so big that afterwards they are worthy objects of my satire and no one can reproach me any longer.