The heroes of obtrusiveness, people with whom no soldier would lie down in the trenches, though he has to submit to being interviewed by them, break into recently abandoned royal castles so that they can report, "We got there first!" It would be far less shameful to be paid for committing atrocities than for fabricating them.

A child learns to discard his ideals, whereas a grown-up never wears out his short pants.

Sorrento, August. For two weeks now I haven't heard a German word or understood an Italian one. This way one can manage to live with people; everything goes like clockwork and no irksome misunderstanding can arise.

What torture, this life in society! Often someone is obliging enough to offer me a light, and in order to oblige him I have to fish a cigarette out of my pocket.

A plagiarist should be made to copy the author a hundred times.

If someone calls me vain and mean, I know that he trusts me and has something to confess to me.

What are all the orgies of Bacchus when compared to the intoxication of someone who completely surrenders to continence!