We are, all of us, crippled and twisted. Most of us strive desperately to keep our grotesqueries out of sight and mind. Our suffering is transformed by an alchemy of the soul into addiction, ulcers, strokes, hatred, even war.

The bad things don't seem to happen to bad people.' That's because they already did. There's no original evil left in the world.

Relationships are never chance events.

Most children would rather preserve the fantasy of a loving connection with their fathers and mothers, at all costs, even if it costs them their self-esteem. When you're three or seven years old, it's less frightening to think of yourself as an unlovable, disappointing screwup than to recognize the fact that you're living with a monster.

For a psychiatrist to be any good, he has to be willing to corner you, close off the easy exits, even when it hurts. It's supposed to. (46)

...Some people hurt so much they can't take what they need, even when someone wants to give it to them. (106)

What was it about not knowing a person that allowed you to wonder whether she might be the answer to all your problems?