Most children would rather preserve the fantasy of a loving connection with their fathers and mothers, at all costs, even if it costs them their self-esteem. When you're three or seven years old, it's less frightening to think of yourself as an unlovable, disappointing screwup than to recognize the fact that you're living with a monster.

What about my rights? What about a person's privacy? Did all that just go to hell after 9/11?

Most children would rather preserve the fantasy of a loving connection with their fathers and mothers, at all costs, even if it costs them their self-esteem. When you're three or seven years old, it's less frightening to think of yourself as an unlovable, disappointing screwup than to recognize the fact that you're living with a monster.

What was it about not knowing a person that allowed you to wonder whether she might be the answer to all your problems?

God is not attracted to mountaintops or church steeples. God is drawn to suffering, and the dark places it surfaces, which is why sharing pain freely feels very much like love, and may be the same thing. (207)

The roots of any evil deed can be traced to the perpetrator's refusal to experience pain.

When people can do something simple to avoid conflict--say, hit a button or unlock a latch--they'll generally do it.