Don't quit your day jobs, boys, but always keep your sense of humor.

You have to almost apologize for saying, please enforce the laws. The laws, that they're [government] receiving good federal dollars to be able to ensure for public safety, which is incumbent upon them to secure on the streets in every city and state across this country. And instead government allows individuals who are a risk, who are a threat, to come back in the country, routinely, regularly without any kind of checks and balances.

We have the best military in the world.

You listen to the intelligence community, they say, listen, maybe it's ISIS today, it's somebody else tomorrow. We'll deal with the caliphate, but it's going to take years to be able to handle this.

There's no doubt, that if you were a Clinton Foundation donor and you wanted your calls returned, I have no doubt that people got their returned.

I'll tell you what, [Hillary Clinton] is not making America safer by her actions and because as it relates to Benghazi, as it relates the e-mail scandal, as to the number of lies and obfuscation that she has engaged in throughout the course of this investigation and lack of transparency. And specifically, she's making America weaker by telegraphing and telling our enemies that we won't even put troops or boots over there. You don't know what's going to happen down the road

Swedish meatballs are to die for.