Improv requires your audience to be informed about what improv is. With stand-up, anybody can sit down and watch stand-up and laugh at jokes.

So many funny things happen to me everyday I should have a TV show.

If you're waiting for inspiration, you'll wait until you're dead.

New York is a place that can grind you down and spit you out. A true New Yorker doesn't get ground down, he gets polished.

I've had a good run of birthdays, and now no one will notice when I die.

People have said that to me: They say I have a TV face.

Paint yourself into a corner so that you don't have any other option but to continue forward.