I learned how to make jokes because I wanted to give people as much fun as they did, and I guess I did, too.

Even as I speak, the very last polar bear may be dying of hunger on account of climate change, on account of us. And I sure miss the polar bears. Their babies are so warm and cuddly and trusting, just like ours.

I can't tell if you're serious or not,' said the driver. I won't know myself until I find out if life is serious or not,' said Trout. 'It's dangerous, I know, and it can hurt a lot. That doesn't necessarily mean it's serious, too.

the late twentieth century will go down in history, i'm sure, as an era of pharmaceutical buffoonery.

But anyway, it's obvious through human experience that extended families and tribes are terribly important. We can do without an extended family as human beings about as easily as we can do without vitamins or essential minerals.

Make war not on terrorism but on ignorance, on sickness and on environmental degradation.

Being a Humanist means trying to behave decently without expectation of rewards or punishment after you are dead.