It is time for me to be dead for a little while - and then live again.

The best jokes are dangerous, and dangerous because they are in some way truthful.

Human beings will believe in all kinds of things that aren't true, and that's okay. And TV is a part of that.

It appeared to the Elders that the people here would believe anything about themselves, no matter how preposterous, as long as it was flattering. To make sure of this, they performed an experiment. They put the idea into Earthlings' heads that the whole Universe had been created by one big animal who looked just like them. He sat on a throne with a lot of less fancy thrones all around him. When people died they got to sit on those other thrones forever because they were such close relatives of the Creator. The people down here just ate that up!

He didn't look like a soldier at all. He looked like a filthy flamingo.

I never asked to be born in the first place.

Vietnam was a country where America was trying to make people stop being communists by dropping things on them from airplanes.