I found me a place where I can do good without doing any harm, and I can see I'm doing good, and them I'm doing good for know I'm doing it, and they love me, Unk, as best they can. I found me a home.

Armistice Day has become Veterans' Day. Armistice Day was sacred. Veterans' Day is not.

She was a fool, and so am I, and so is anyone who thinks he sees what God is Doing, [writes Bokonon].

Human beings are about 1,000 times dumber and meaner than they think they are.

God Almighty Himself must have been hilarious when human beings so mingled iron and water and fire as to make a railroad train!

It pains me even now, even a million years later, to write about such human misbehaviour. A million years later, I feel like apologizing for the human race. That’s all I can say.

There is this thing called the university, and everybody goes there now. And there are these things called teachers who make students read this book with good ideas or that book with good ideas until that's where we get our ideas. We don't think them; we read them in books. I like Utopian talk, speculation about what our planet should be, anger about what our planet is. I think writers are the most important members of society, not just potentially but actually. Good writers must have and stand by their own ideas.