The words were a paraphrase of the suggestion of Jesus: "Render therefore unto Caesar the things which are Caesar's." Bokonon's paraphrase was this: "Pay no attention to Caesar. Caesar doesn't have the slightest idea what's really going on.

Educate yourself, welcome life's messiness, read Chekhov, avoid becoming an architect at all costs.

We are about to be attacked by Al Qaeda. Wave flags if you have them. That always seems to scare them away. I'm kidding.

During the Vietnam War, which lasted longer than any war we've ever been in - and which we lost - every respectable artist in this country was against the war. It was like a laser beam. We were all aimed in the same direction. The power of this weapon turns out to be that of a custard pie dropped from a stepladder six feet high.

One of [ways being lucky] was to go to school during the Great Depression because teaching became a plum job.

What is flirtatiousness but an argument that life must go on and on and on?

People aren’t supposed to look back. I’m certainly not going to do it anymore.