I had made her so unhappy that she had developed a sense of humor. [-Rabo Karabekian]

It shook up Trout to realize that even he could bring evil into the world — in the form of bad ideas.

Each one of us has to be what he or she is.

I was some of the mud that got to sit up and look around. Lucky me, lucky mud.

I think William Shakespeare was the wisest human being I ever heard of. To be perfectly frank, though, that's not saying much.

A lot of people were opposed to it. A lot of people were for it. I myself think about it as little as possible.

If I should ever die, God forbid, I hope you will say, 'Kurt is up in heaven now.' That's my favorite joke.