I don't take myself too seriously. I enjoy what I do. I enjoy making people laugh.

He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

I don't think every joke has to be so dadgum cerebral. I mix it up really good, because that's the kind of humor I like. I like the goofy one-liner type stuff.

I've been down in Florida since 1979. When you're born in Nebraska you really can't explain it.

I COULD CARE LESS ABOUT CRITICS, LIKE I SAID THEY DONT BUY TICKETS.

I don't have a lot of recreation time. I've always been under the assumption that if you're selling tickets you need to work. The kind of success that's happened to me maybe only happens to one comedian every twenty years and so I'm on the road constantly.

I was scared into being good. But I'm sure I did regular kid stuff.