I used to think drinking was the only way to be happy. Now I know there is no way to be happy.
Laura KightlingerI want to be so famous that drag queens will dress like me in parades when I'm dead.
Laura KightlingerWomen can really be who they are. I'm about to say the F word, feminist. Often that word has such a negative connotation.
Laura KightlingerIt's a big deal about whether or not gays can march in the St. Patrick's Day Parade and I have to say that on some level I kind of see their point. Because when you think about it, it is a real macho heterosexual event. Bunch of guys in short skirts on a cart made of rose pedals sharing a bag pipe. That's not for sissies.
Laura KightlingerI love eating in it, brushing my teeth and swallowing the toothpaste in it. I love punching the ceiling with my fists when I'm lost or I can't find a parking space.
Laura KightlingerIt goes Christmas, New Year's Eve, Valentine's Day. Is that fair to anyone who's alone? These are all days you gotta be with someone. And if you didn't get around to killing yourself at Christmas or New Year's, boom! There's Valentine's Day. I think there should be one more after Valentine's Day just called, 'Who could love you?'
Laura Kightlinger