"I was just offered a contract on your life, for enough money to make it worth my while." It was my turn to be quiet. "Did you take it?" "Would I be calling you if I had?" "Maybe," I said. He laughed. "True, but I'm not going to take it." "Why not?" "Friendship." "Try again," I said. "I figure I'll get to kill more people guarding you. If I take the contract, I only get to kill you." "Comforting."

Men don't settle down because of the right woman. They settle down because they are finally ready for it. Whatever woman they're dating when they get ready is the one they settle down with, not necessarily the best one or the prettiest, just the one who happened to be on hand when the time got to be right. Unromantic, but still true.

You did not bring down two of the royal guard in an unceremonious heap because the woman in the middle tripped.

That's what you get for telling the truth. Someone calls you a liar. Most people will accept a likely lie to an unlikely truth. In fact, they prefer it.

Never trust people who smile constantly. They're either selling something or not very bright.

a pink taffeta evening gown. It looked like it had run away from a junior high prom... The dress looked like a petunia on steroids to me.

Anita can speak for herself," Richard said. Jean-Claude's attention flicked back to me. "That is certainly true. But I came to see how the two of you enjoyed the play." "And pigs fly," I said. "You don't believe me?" "Not hardly," I said.