Your sexual attributes are simply chemistry and setups within your DNA. They are given by agreement as gifts for you to experience in this life.

The problem with being linear minded is that you would ask this at all! You assume that you must do one or the other. Plan or not plan. How about planning to walk in a certain direction until the "now" offers you another plan?

Planning is like "pointing yourself" in the direction of a target...no more than that. Let your power then redefine the target, and re-point you in the correct direction. Think of it like this: An arrow is never going to hit the target unless it's in flight. If you sit around and wait for God to shoot the arrow, nothing is going to happen.

Don't be so glued to what you planned that you can't change it.

Don't be so fond of what you planned that somehow to change it seems like a violation of your own choice and wisdom. It's just the opposite.

Thirty years ago, interracial marriage was considered to be wrong by the laws of God. Now your society finds it common. The spiritual objections around it were either dropped or "rewritten" by those divinely inspired and authorized to do so. Therefore, your actual interpretations of the instructions from God changed with your society's tolerance level - an interesting thing, indeed, how the interpretations of God seem to change regularly to match a changing culture!

When you start to build self-worth and redeem your magnificence, the fears go away... you void your fears via your realization of your own self-worth.