I've come down in the world. I've slid to a place where the ceiling is low and there isn't much room for me to move.Most of the time I'm used to it ... I accepted my sentence and do not brood or look back. But sometimes a shift makes me remember. Routine is ruffled and a new start makes me suddenly conscious of what I've become -

The Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, said, When Allah loves a people, He tries them.

The sweetest things in life were not necessarily what one strove for and grabbed. Instead, many many times the All-Merciful, the All-Generous would give His servants without being petitioned, without waiting to be asked.

I must settle for freedom in this modern time

Allah tests our patience and our fortitude. He tests out strength of faith. be patient and there will endless rewards for you, insha'Allah" - Utaz Badr

I wanted to be good but I wasn't sure if I was prepared

Control yourself, it is not worth it. You will regret your rudeness afterwards, your sensitive nature will be troubled