People sometimes focus on the red button hot topic issues and I'm, like, you know, who cares about priestly celibacy? I'm thinking about how am I forgiving my enemies? How am I turning the other cheek? How am I loving my neighbor as myself? To me that's 10,000 times more difficult than to say should priests be married or not be married? I'm, like, I think we're wasting all out energies on the wrong thing. Let's work on the most difficult stuff.

I don't know any saint who wanted to be the patron saint of kissing.

I think the best part of being Catholic, strange as it might sound, is that I know it's right. It's true.

We always think of saints as these monks or nuns or popes or priests from centuries ago who were celibate or lived very quiet lives. Maybe we don't know a lot about a lot them but what I'm saying is the saints of the 21st century are gonna be regular people - people who've kissed other people. They're gonna be married people.

Catholic media sucks. It's boring. It's for old people. It's not interesting. It's like you're in a class with an 80 year old nun.

According to the Church, one of the key attributes of sainthood is death. You have to die first. So, I'll agree already (that) I might not have all the attributes that usually that the Church looks for when canonizing somebody because I'm supposed to be dead already.

Guilt is always a good thing. If I kick you in the groin right now and don't feel guilty about it there's something wrong with me. Something's wrong with my conscience.