My mother loved people and she loved conversation, and she loved to engage with people. She was a really fantastic person. You would've really liked her.

After 34 years, I feel like I did when I was starting out. I feel excited and feel I've never been better doing what I do.

I think what people were trying with me was to figure out who I was. They thought I was funny, but they were like, "How can we use this guy so he can regularly do this?" Does that make any sense? I think people were trying to figure out if my fat peg would fit in their square hole.

I'm a big game show fan. When you're a poor person, you watch game shows. I don't think people realize that. Maybe everybody watches game shows, but when you're poor, you live vicariously through those people.

I'm washing lettuce. Soon, I'll be on fries. In a few years, I'll make assistant manager, and that's when the big bucks start rolling in.

I think Splash made people realize that I was still alive, and I think I inspired a lot of people. I have people coming up to me all the time in the airport saying, "Hey, you inspired me to learn how to swim!" "You inspired me to start moving around more." "You inspired me to start doing more for myself." So that was good. But mostly I took it because nobody had given me a job. And you know what really matters in life, right?

When I say, 'I can't stay long, I'm in-between meals,' that plays differently on the radio than it does in person. So I have to pick material that works because the words are funny, not just because of the images.