Give me a dollar or I'll spit on you.

I jog in the morning and then write for about two hours. There are times when I'm really excited and can't wait to get back to it. But there are days when I don't know what's coming next, and I really have to force it.

I guess what led to me writing 'Holes' was having moved to Texas in 1991, and it was sort of my reaction to Texas.

Whenever you give someone a present or sing a holiday song, you're helping Santa Claus. To me, that's what Christmas is all about. Helping Santa Claus!

He could hardly lift his spoon during breakfast, and then he was out on the lake, his spoon soon replaced by a shovel.

I may have ruined my life, but at least I got to eat some really good Chinese food.

There is no lake at Camp Green Lake.