We are all going to die, sometimes even in the middle of a lease.

Addicts sometimes have a penchant for becoming the center of attention at other people's celebrations.

Don't let a friend make you feel publicly uncomfortable indefinitely just because they're probably a lesbian.

If this is something you'd truly like to work on, not out of a sense of guilt but because you would enjoy occasionally reciprocating, there are a wealth of resources out there for the enthusiastic amateur (you are far from the only would-be blow-jobber whose spirit is willing but gag reflex is weak). You have more options than "no blow jobs, ever" and "regular whole-hog sessions to completion that result in vomiting."

Don't beat yourself up over what you dream about.

You are allowed to draw lines even if your feelings are irrational. Part of the marvelous business of being an adult human is that you get to set your own boundaries for whatever reasons you like, without appending a sensible rationale to them.

There has to be some kind of personal hygiene bar that a person needs to clear in order for a relationship to be successful.