When you commit your life to something and it doesn't work out, it is a tough place to be. Suicide can be the spiritual reprieve of a faithless person. I knew I could always just end it, and there was solace in that.

I found a great deal of relief and excitement watching comics when I was very young. My grandmother was very into them and so was my grandfather. They had a profound effect on me, so I just found myself watching comedians on the after-school shows: Merv Griffin and that kind of stuff.

In a lot of ways, I'm seeking some sort of peace of mind for myself. I'm a fairly emotionally petty, resentful guy who has an inflated sense of himself, and I needed to take that down a notch.

I’m glad to be part of the war on sadness. I’m a part time employee of the illusion that keeps people stupid.

I was married once before, and I stopped.

Most of my comedy writing happens through improvisation on stage; doing it in the moment.

Dogs are too much to handle. I don't need anything in my house that's needier than me.