You make sacrifices to become a mother, but you really find yourself and your soul.

Yes. I did more research than I ever wanted to and saw some things I wish I didn't. I went on ride-alongs, spent time with Homicide, Cold Case, and SVU detectives, hung out in subways learning how to spot pervs and pick-pockets, viewed an autopsy, went to a police firing range, and witnessed court cases and I read, read, read.

I'm a big believer that your word is your wand. You know how people say things like, 'Oh my gosh, I'm such an idiot.' I don't say things like that anymore. Those put-downs, even if they're in jest, are little bullets of negativity that you don't need in your life.

These days we don’t have to fit into something other people think we are. We’ve leveled the playing field, life is inclusive. I’m a mom, sex detective, wife, fearless, gentle — we can now, with grace, be all of what we are.

I want to be a fun mom. Not a gasping for air mom.

I realize that you have to show up for your life.

Healing takes time, and asking for help is a courageous step.