Make yourself look really stupid so you don't feel bad doing something a little stupid.

Why do scuba divers fall backwards off a boat? Because if they fell forwards they'd still be in the boat.

Yeah, I actually do know where I am.

There's no doubt that the ready availability of music online has created a thousand more opportunities than it's destroyed.

Every one of those old songs like "What's My Age Again?" and "All the Small Things" is like a tattoo or a scrapbook or an old photograph. There are just songs that define certain moments in your life. Everyone has a song that got them through a bad breakup or they put on and it made them feel like they wanted to go out and kick the world's ass with their friends on a weekend. Those songs still feel like that to me.

There is nothing more awkward and more laughable than a naked dude with his wiener flopping.

The last few years I became a lot more into sports. Growing up, the sports I liked were independent sports, like skateboarding. I was really into skateboarding, and not necessarily team televised sports.