Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any.
Never mistake motion for progress.
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get the same money for cop.
When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
Whatever a man's age, he can reduce it several years by putting a bright-colored flower in his button-hole.
The political and commercial morals of the United States are not merely food for laughter, they are an entire banquet.