I used to think my father was an idiot, until I turned twenty-one... Then I thought he was a genus.

The old Irish when immersing a babe at baptism left out the right arm so that it would remain pagan for good fighting

Satan (impatiently) to Newcomer: The trouble with you Chicago people is, that you think you are the best people down here; whereas you are merely the most numerous.

Memories which someday will become all beautiful when the last annoyance that encumbers them shall have faded out of our minds.

By "trampling upon the helpless abroad" with unchecked surveillance, Americans have learned, "by a natural process, to endure with apathy the like at home."

...the administration of the law can never go lax where every individual sees to it that it grows not lax in his own case, or in cases which fall under his eyes.

The time to begin writing an article is when you have finished it to your satisfaction. By that time you begin to clearly and logically perceive what it is you really want to say.