We need not worry so much about what man descends from; it's what he descends to that shames the human race.

The convention missionaries call "modesty" has no standard, and cannot have one, because it is opposed to nature and reason and is therefore an artificiality and subject to anybody's whim - anybody's diseased caprice.

I take my only exercise acting as a pallbearer at the funerals of my friends who exercise regularly.

I have spent most of my life worrying about things that have never happened.

It’s not the good that die young, it’s the lucky.

One learns peoples through the heart, not the eyes or the intellect.

Put no trust in the benefits to accrue from early rising, as set forth by the infatuated Franklin.