If the Christians of America could be persuaded to vote God and a clean ticket, it would bring about a moral revolution that would be incalculably beneficent. It would save the country.

The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it.

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes.

Rags, wretchedness, poverty and dirt, those signs and symbols that indicate the presence of [Muslim] rule more surely than the crescent-flag itself, abound.

I have never taken any exercise, except sleeping and resting, and I never intend to take any. Exercise is loathsome. And it cannot be any benefit when you are tired; and I was always tired.

It has taken a weary long time to persuade American Presbyterians to give up infant damnation and try to bear it the best they can.

The only very marked difference between the average civilized man and the average savage is that the one is gilded and the other is painted.