Man is a marvelous curiosity...he thinks he is the Creator's pet...he even believes the Creator loves him; has passion for him; sits up nights to admire him; yes and watch over him and keep him out of trouble. He prays to him and thinks he listens. Isn't it a quaint idea.

Congressman is the trivialist distinction for a full grown man.

Civilization is a limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessities.

The Autocrat of Russia possesses more power than any other man in the earth; but he cannot stop a sneeze.

I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time.

We need not worry so much about what man descends from; it's what he descends to that shames the human race.

We all like to see people sea-sick when we are not ourselves.