I get letters from women, and they say, 'I love your Roman nose.' If I weren't on TV and I walked past that same woman, she'd go, 'Did you see the beak on that guy?'

I get letters from women, and they say, 'I love your Roman nose.' If I weren't on TV and I walked past that same woman, she'd go, 'Did you see the beak on that guy?'

The fact that you fell out of bed makes some people think you had more than one drink before you called for help.

Not a lot of conservatives on this list. Are more liberals than conservatives screwing up America?

Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two but can't remember what they are.

So you can look me in the eye and say that you are a president committed to cleaning up the environment?

Not only is it a great concept and a great idea -- helping people -- it's good pizza too!