My other friends are in music relaxation class, which I do not attend, because smooth jazz makes me angry sometimes.

I’m a screwed-up person who no longer knows how to communicate with the people I love. But I meant everything I told you in my letter. If I were your Nikki, I would have come back to you on Christmas Day, but I’m not Nikki. I know. And I’m sorry.

There will always be a part of me that is dirty and sloppy, but I like that, just like all the other parts of myself.

I am trying to be kind instead of right.

Did you ever think about all of the nights you lived through and can't remember The ones that were so mundane your brain just didn't bother to record them. Hundreds, maybe thousands of nights come and go without being preserved by our memory. Does that ever freak you out? Like maybe your mind recorded all of the wrong nights?

Looking into another person's eyes for an extended period of time proved to be a powerful thing. And if you don't believe me, try it yourself.

Also, I sort of let my appearance go, to the point where I was maybe ten to seventy pounds overweight.