Once again, her parents' problems had run through her life like a piece of heavy equipment, smashing everything in their way.

I read two mysteries a day when I was a kid. All of Agatha Christie, all of 'Sherlock Holmes.' I've seen every single British detective show ever made.

She wasn't only gay, she was a gay elf.

Debbie had to get up and slice me a thick piece of cake before she could answer. And I do mean thick. Harry Potter volume seven thick. I could have knocked out a burglar with this piece of cake. Once I tasted it, though, it seemed just the right size.

I try to shake it loose-but these ideas, they cling. It's like I'm shackled to them with an iron chain. They rattle along behind me, dragging against the ground, always reminding me of their presence.

I may have been a complete lunatic, but I was a complete lunatic with manners.

A woman who shaves or otherwise depilates her pubic curls has a profound interest in recreational sex.