Nothing was quite like it was supposed to be.

She's gone. Been gone for ages. They split up right after you left. That's why the grass out front started growing again." "He's got a new girlfriend?" she said quietly. "Thank god. You must be happy." "Yeah. He does. It's a relief. She's a lot nicer. But then, your average angry snake is nicer than Fiona. I'm sure she's happier wherever she is now, burning orphans or whatever she does with her time.

Prefects. I had learned this one. Student council types, but with superpowers. They who must be obeyed.

Well, what now? You have no job. I have no job. Wanna play Jenga?

Sometimes I even felt like he dated me as part of his plan, like they were going to have a checklist on the application, and one of the things to tick off was going to be, "Do you have a reasonably intelligent girlfriend who shares your aspirations, and who is fully prepared to accept your limited availability?

Tired, but not the kind of tired that sleep fixes.

A woman who shaves or otherwise depilates her pubic curls has a profound interest in recreational sex.