The hospitable instinct is not wholly altruistic. There is pride and egoism mixed up with it.

Strange when you come to think of it, that of all countless folk who have lived on this planet, not one is known in history or in legend as having died of laughter.

I believe the twenty-four hour day has come to stay.

What a lurid life Oscar Wilde does lead - so full of extraordinary incidents. What a chance for the memoir writers of the next century

Incongruity is the mainspring of laughter.

You cannot make a man by standing a sheep on its hind-legs. But by standing a flock of sheep in that position you can make a crowd of men.

Sometimes I feel that I am a natural born genius in a field of human endeavor that hasn't been invented yet