It’s one thing to protect yourself,” Dad yelled at me during our very next lunch. “That I get. Have I ever told you not to defend yourself? No. But did you have to permanently maim him? I spent all that money on that on that fancy school for girls-not to mention all that money for the shrinks-and what did that get me?” I shrugged. “A seven-figure civil suit?

So take my advice: whatever you do? Don’t blink

They just kept grinning at me from over the stupid sign, Dopey because he's too dumb to know any better, Doc because – well, I guess because he might have been glad to see me. Doc's weird that way. Sleepy, the oldest, just stood there, looking … well, sleepy.

I really wanted to be veterinarian, but I got a 410 on my math SATs.

This is not to say that I wasn't completely repulsed. I mean, I wasn't exactly proud that my stepbrother was in there tongue wrestling with the second stupidest person in our class, after himself.

It's truly weird how everyone just thinks they can bring me Diet Coke and everything will be okay. Especially since it's pretty much true.-Lizzie Nichols

...it was never a good idea to date a foreigner. You can never tell when they're lying.' 'hello. Dave was BRITISH.