I think people figure out early in their lives what currency they can work in.

I always hated those classic kid movies like Old Yeller or The Yearling where the beloved pet dies. What would be so wrong with having those damn kids learn their lessons about mortality from watching Grandpa kick? Then at least the dog would be around to comfort them.

Some people know that they are so adorable looking, all they have to do is smile and dress up and they get plenty from that. Then there are some of us who, early on, see that that doesn't work. So we joke about it.

Every moment of your life that is not a complete nightmare is happiness.

No one would argue against the fact that L.A. leads the country in opportunities for being hip and pretentious.

Beware the man who doesn't ask you any questions about yourself on your first date.

my mother ... took the fact that my taste differed from hers as a personal insult.