I think people hate me pretty much across the board, which is nice.

I don't necessarily self-identify as a writer, 'cause it implies a certain level of intelligence.

Things you never thought were going to turn into something end up being the most important things in your life. You have to learn to not try to control it.

I was very surprised how many people were earnestly reminiscing about the '80s. It's such a stupid thing to do, like, to be honestly invested in nostalgia. It never even occurred to me to do that.

Whatever I write I publish. Because that's where the money is.

My process is surprisingly straightforward. I find myself with little to do over a stretch of time and I say, "I should write children's books today." Then I sit down and write a children's book, and if it takes more than, realistically, three hours, I feel like I've done something wrong.

I never really understood what was expected of me as a man, or how I was supposed to interact with women, but worse, with other guys. I did not relate to them.