They talk about how men are chasers, but women are just like that too. At least a lot of the women that I know, who tend to be ambitious, professionally driven women, they love that. Like seeking something professional that is hard to get, I think they feel the same way about men.

Catharsis isn't art. You can't rely on catharsis to get a laugh. Because guess what? People do laugh when something's shocking, but that is, to me, the absolute fakest of laughs. That's not something that sustains a television series, or a movie, or even 45 minutes of a stand-up set at Carolines.

Future hipsters will love me ironically.

It doesn't help for you to name a character's first name be Mindy and then be like, "I'm nothing like the character."

A remarkable thing about me is that the time that elapses between a sad thought and a flood of tears is three or four seconds.

Why is everyone trying to tell me that when you get older it gets better?

I'm a smart enough person to know that I don't want everyone to be cookie-cutter versions of the nine guys who wear Converse sneakers.