So far as I know, anything worth hearing is not usually uttered at seven o'clock in the morning; and if it is, it will generally be repeated at a more reasonable hour for a larger and more wakeful audience.

Playwriting, like begging in India, is an honorable but humbling profession.

Charity in the theater begins and ends with those who have a play opening within a week of one's own.

Charity in the theatre usually begins and ends with people who have a play opening the week following one's own. Their unlikely benevolence is not so much a purity of heart as the knowledge that they face a firing line with rifles aimed in exactly the same direction.

There is nothing like tasting the grit of fear for rediscovering that the umbilical cord is made of piano wire.

Julie Andrews has a wonderful British strength that makes you wonder why they lost India.

Far more quickly than reason and logic, irony can penetrate rage and puncture self-pity.